Former Qantas flight attendant Owen Beddall reveals the passengers that cabin crew loathe. And the underhand ways that the crews get back at them...
Being a flight attendant isn't quite as glamorous as it seems. Cooped up in a glorified tin can with people who really want to be somewhere else can be both trying and tiring – especially when those passengers are obnoxious as well.
After 12 years working for Qantas, Owen Beddall has seen it all. Here, he lists the type of passengers that every flight attendant hates – and the underhand tricks they'll use to get their own back...
Of course, I’m joking. But asleep is good.
People who are loud and talking, and won't sit still, are disruptive to everyone’s experience and often compromise security too.
People who say it’s too hot or too cold. Or they are a lacto-intolerant vegan but haven't ordered a special meal and then are bewildered when we don't have an in-house specialist chef. That is a tad annoying.
People who have gone to a great deal of trouble to get themselves upgraded because they are middle management or were once in a girl/boy band and now want to tell you how important they are. Politicians are a perfect example, and on small flights they often can't believe it when the eight-horse cavalry and brandy trolley doesn't follow.
Certain people think they are superior to others – and that's ridiculous.
And the ways that flight attendants get you back...
They will avoid you and disappear for hours.
Your coffee will taste funny because it's decaffeinated. Your flight attendant wants you asleep.
Lights and blinds will mysteriously have to go down when you are trying to read a book. Again, they want you asleep.
In the morning, when you are exhausted and ready to sleep, the lights and blinds will go up again. Time to land and finally get rid of you.
Your flight attendant will go slow on purpose. If they see your legs over hanging the seat arms they will bump them.
Owen Beddall worked as a Qantas first-class flight attendant for 12 years. He has travelled to over 40 countries on six continents. His book, Confessions of a Qantas Flight Attendant, lifts the lid on what really goes on at 35,000ft.
Main Image: Flight attendant dealing with passenger (Shutterstock)